Boundaries etch lines into our psyche like a potter etches design through the waxy ground on a goblet. Or like ocean sand grinds and polishes glass lost to the waves.
Some of our boundaries are intentional but many dig in unnoticed through our experiences, observations, mistakes. Only when we walk into a similar situation do we realize we hold an opinion. Only when that opinion is challenged do we realize how important it has become, how deeply rooted.
Boundaries maintained by fear paralyze us, disassociate us from ability to analyze and evaluate possible benefits of changing our position. Fear causes reactions to erupt from our *brain stem, emotional and irrational as we carve community into pieces irretrievable when we decide we desperately need to recreate a productive whole.
We may consider ourselves safe within such boundaries. In fact, we are isolated.
Dementia builds walls with fear as it slowly strangles rational past behavior. The challenge of caregiving is to learn the new boundaries as they appear, and adjust our behavior to accommodate. The challenge of leadership is to listen to community members explore the formation and defense of their boundaries.
*The human brain is divided into three parts: the Neocortex analyzes, observes, creates; the Mammalian loves, hates, bonds and plays; the brain stem or Reptilian controls automatic functions, survival, and unconscious acts like breathing.